I want to get married.
I want to but I don't want to at the same time. I'm ambivalent. I didn't used to be. I was god damned sure I was going to marry this man and we were going to live happily ever after.
Now I'm not so sure. He keeps telling me he loves me - every day in fact. And that I'm hawt and cute.
But you know that whole "Actions speak louder than words" thing? Yeah, that's the one that's starting to hold me up.
Which makes me doubt, which turns me off, which shuts down one avenue of connecting (sex), which leads to people being snippy and/or cold, which leads to me thinking he's fucking stoopid.
About Me
- Head Like Velvet
- Recently resurrected female. Now enjoying the pinnacle of my sex life, trying to squeeze the most I can out of the wealth I've been given. And I mean wealth in terms of peace, love, happiness, and faith.
1 comment:
Sorry to hear that. I know. I mean, I doubt everything and have felt like this so much before too. Even now with being engaged there's still a twinge of it. For me it's more that I'm afraid of the unknown and letting myself really let go and trust in something, more than it really is about HIM. I don't know your "situation" of course, but I think I've known the feeling, so for what it's worth I feel ya and hope that it improves.
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